4. It's Not My Age.

This might be a norm, might be not. But since high school, I've been piling on weight instead of losing it, despite my active lifestyle. My conclusion? Food are getting unhealthier.

Of course I won't blame myself, dammit.

When I was schooling, I enjoyed playing pretense. With my walkman on (wow there's red line under the word 'walkman' - it's no longer in the dictionary or had it always not been there?), and that Enchanteur talc powder bottle as my microphone, I'd lock my bedroom door and pretended that I was performing in front of thousands of audience. I did this since I was 12.

My favourite magazine then was CLEO because their fitness section always featured new workout routines I could use to tighten this and that muscle (and the magazine was, and still is inexpensive), so on and so forth. I'd compile them all in a file and perform them all every two days if not everyday. Yes, I worked out in my tiny bedroom.

Then in matriculation, I went jogging every weekend in the morning to the point that I could not stop running for an hour or so. In university, the first year, I didn't eat rice at all. Staying on the fourth floor helped a lot to keep the weight at bay as well. I played tennis a lot, too. After my second year, I jogged at Tasik Section 7, Shah Alam every evening on weekdays, and both mornings and evenings on weekends. I'd get restless if I missed a day for no reason.

I was pretty fit. And tanned than I've ever been my whole life.

Now, unfortunately, I could feel my fitness level had gone down tremendously. Though I eat healthier options of food with occasional binge eating, and I try to be as active as possible, like doing cardio in the evenings when I come home early from work, I am just not feeling as fit. I tried joining the gym but it was so boring.

Gyms are usually air-conditioned so I have to work extra hard to achieve whatever the hell it is I want to achieve due to the lack of oxygen in the gym room. That's why I love going outdoor for jogging. Nothing beats fresh air.

I guess, the age is catching up.

Food is not helping much either. Last time, there was no Butterscotch bread, people! >:(

Since I was always trying to stay healthy since I was much younger, in my head, to get fit, apart from managing food intake, YOU MUST WORKOUT. If you only cut down on food intake solely, I don't see the point of losing weight. This is pretty much programmed in my head. That's why I always cringe when I hear women skip meals to lose weight but don't try to be active to intentionally lose those extra calories.

But I know for a fact that you can lose weight JUST by cutting calories intake. I did it before, I saw it on TV on a British or Australian (I find it hard to tell which is which) show where they'd put four people to the test; each was put in a different routine for eight weeks to see which way was the fastest to get a six-pack (one - cardio; two - sit-ups; three - strict diet; four - weight train). The one who was the fastest to lose body fats was the one on a strict diet, and the one doing cardio comes to close second.

So yeah, you could lose weight just by controlling your diet. But I guess, I am looking for more than just weight loss. BECAUSE I NEED TO BE FIT TO BE HAPPY. Yeah, liposuction is not an option either. I can't afford it anyway.

Now I am using porn images (mostly in .gif format) to motivate myself to be fitter. For good reason, all is forgiven, right?

Matlamat tak menghalalkan cara? Piss off.